Definition of Normal

Hey Guys!

I was just wondering what everyone's definition of "normal" is. I personally think there is no such thing... I mean, you can say I'm not normal because I have Tourettes, but I could say you're not normal because you have brown eyes, and I have blue ones. No one is normal... Or maybe everyone is their own type of normal.

Dictionary.com describes normal as: conforming to the standard or the common type; usual; notabnormal; regular; natural.

It says "regular" and "natural",  and conforming to the "standard or the common type", and "usual". But what is usual? It's just a synonym. And what is standard, or common? Who gets to say what is normal? Maybe different things are normal in different environments, like what is normal in a specific clique at school, or a culture... But, what is normal overall? What is normal for ALL of the cliques and EVERY single culture? Apparently I'm not normal, because I have Tourettes, but doesn't everyone have a little something? Maybe I'm normal and you're not. Normal may speak as what the majority of the population does or thinks, but wouldn't that just be popular?

One of my former classmates asked me this. She must have thought my videos and blog were a joke or something. She says that she knows I'm not normal, but who is she to judge if I am normal or not? Who is she to say that I'm the weird one out? I do have Tourettes, and I'm not one of those cruel people who joke about disorders. She wasn't joking about my disorder, but the way that she said she knew I wasn't normal was a bit rude.

Also, I saw this in a book I was reading. People with Tourettes are not morons, and no one has the right to call someone a moron. I know everyone was taught not to in preschool, so why do people keep making fun of others? I'm not saying I'm perfect, and that I've never made a snide remark, but that barely ever happens, and if I'm calling you a bitch, then you really are a bitch. I just wonder if this author, Sara Shepard, ever stopped to think, "What if some of my readers had Tourettes? How would they react? Would they stop reading my books?" I didn't stop reading the book, because it was just too good to stop reading. All you have to do is brush off someone's comment, because if they are saying something to pull you down, that means they are already lower than you. That mean girl at school that is always bothering you? She's not as good as you if she has to pick on you to feel good about herself. Always keep that in mind,   and the next time she says something mean, just be nice back to her. Kill em' with kindness! And always be kind to everyone, for all people are going through their own struggles. No one is to judge whose struggles are worse, and whose are easier. No one is to say who is normal, and who is not normal. No one can bring you down, unless you let them.
Seriously, treat others the way you want to be treated. You never know what they could be going through. If you're having a hard time with bullies or people who are "normal" and classify you as "not normal", always remember, they could end up working at a Taco Bell one day because they are too rude to work high up in a business branch. This is a total exaggeration, but seriously think about it. That stereotypical popular dumb jock who pushes you around is probably going to have the same job he has now in high school  until retirement. Guys like those live in the good times and never grow up. Gosh, haven't you seen the movies?(;
And if I EVER see that someone has told another person to kill themselves, I will be furious. You never know how that person actually feels about themselves. I remember I went through a really rough time in the seventh grade where I was extremely depressed. I'm really glad no one told me to go kill myself, because when people tell others that, the reaction is usually not very positive. I mean, there was once when my friend's ex-boyfriend told me, "Go home and just kill yourself. Nobody loves you. Just kill yourself." And those words have always stuck in my mind. What I just wrote is an exact quote. He was joking, but I was going through a very rough time when he told me that. Of course, I didn't kill myself, since I'm obviously writing this. There's always at least one thing in someone's life that they have to live for. If you ever feel depressed, I'd be happy to lift you up. You can just email me at lifesatwitch.emma@gmail.com. I'm there for everyone and anyone.

Anyway, please take my words into consideration, and as always, thank you for reading.(:

Emma<3

It's A Hard Tic Time

Hey Everyone!

So, I'm really stressed right now because I have two big tests tomorrow. This stress results in ticcing. I can barely focus on this blog post. My anxiety is practically taking over my body. I was just trying to exercise, but I can't because I'm ticcing too much. I know some people with Tourettes say exercise helps them cope with tics, but I can't exercise at all while ticcing. It's not a distraction for me; it's an obstacle.
School has kept me really busy, and I have been stressing a little more than usual. I started up on a slightly new medicine a month or two ago called Abilify. It had helped me in the past, and thank God, it is helping me again! I used to take it, but then my dad got another job and the new insurance wouldn't cover it, so it was around $800 for about a two-month supply. I had to switch medicines, since my family could not afford this. Thankfully, my dad works at SAS now, which covers the cost of Abilify so that it isn't completely ridiculous.
It's getting kind of hard to type, so I think I am going to go make a video about how my tics are in a rough time.

Thanks for reading!

Emma<3

YouTube Videos!

Hey guys,

It's really important to me that you guys check these videos out. I would love to be requested for a partnership on YouTube, and I need a TON of views for that! So please tell your friends, and share this link!!!

http://www.youtube.com/user/lifesatwitchemma?feature=mhee

THANK YOU

Emma<3

Different, But The Same

Hey everyone!

So, right now I am uploading a video onto YouTube. It is a Tourettes Q&A. The video name is “Tourette Syndrome Q&A”, so look it up! Also, follow me on Twitter at @itslifesatwitch, and like “Life’s A Twitch” on Facebook!(:

I would like to stress the fact that people with Tourette Syndrome are still people too. I have a pretty much ordinary teenage life, except I have a few things about me that make me very different from the other kids. Even though I am very different, I am very same as them at the same time. It’s confusing, but it’s true. I have a disorder that is… let’s face it, pretty peculiar. It is a part of my life though, and I have good and accepting friends. I tic, unlike all the other kids I know, but I still hang out with friends, get boyfriends, and go to parties. Not wild parties… yet. I know that one day I am going to be the designated driver for my crazy best friend *Holly (*name changed). Even though I’m extremely anxious about driving, I’ve been encouraged that I’ll be able to do it, and maybe I can one day. I may have four different medicines prescribed to me, but I still go to sleepovers and have fun. I may stay up until the AM ticcing so hard that I get cramps in my muscles, but I still go out to places with my friends the next day. I may have extreme anxiety about driving, but I still take Holly’s golf cart out for a spin almost every weekend. I may go to a psychiatrist, but hey, who doesn’t these days? I may need things to be symmetrical, but I still wear cute dresses even if they cannot be one-shoulder dresses. I may stress out over school everyday, but I still get straight A’s. I might have gone to the emergency room for a tic that was non-stop for over 40 hours, but I’m still a pretty healthy person. I may have Tourettes, but Tourettes doesn’t have me.

In three years, I am going to college, just like most everyone else. In about ten years, I’m going to get married, just like everyone else. In around 12 years, I will have children, just like everyone else. I fully intend on having a normal life- with a few of my own fun twists of course! I’d love to be an actress in a TV show or a movie star, or even a singer. I’m going to get a job one day, just like the rest of a fraction of the United States population (A little economical humor, eh?). I am going to write novels and be a best-selling author. I am going to raise my daughter Temperence, and my son Cameron Sealy into amazing people. I will have a loving husband who will make me sandwiches. These things I also fully intend on happening. Yes, I do pathetically have my kids’ names planned out already. Anyway, I just wanted to outline the fact that even though I’m very different, I’m very much normal at the same time (Even though I’m a bit more fun than just plain old normal).

                                     Me                                        “Holly”

As always, thank you for reading.(:

Emma<3

Thank God for Valium

Hello All,

It really has been too long. I have to remember to post! Life has just been so busy, and I've been so stressed. There has been a lot on my plate.

So what are the highlights of my life lately?
Well, as you all know, I have my new prescription, Valium. I have had to use it about twice. Last Monday, in the middle of the night my leg muscle tightening tic got out of control. It was unbearable. It was one of those nights that I felt the need to crawl out of my skin, and my body was not my own. Do you know what that feels like? To not want to be awake. That's what I have to do sometimes. I have to knock myself out in order to stay somewhat sane. So, I took the Valium and it worked pretty well. The night was very choppy, though.
At first, when I started repetitively tightening my muscles- virtually unable to stop, I started letting out some screams because I couldn't bear it. My mother came to my aide and started to rub my back in order to calm me down. She started to fear that I may have been slipping into another 52-hour tic attack. I hadn't thought of it like that, but thankfully it was not that bad. My mom had gone downstairs to call my doctor and ask what we should do, so she made me wait in my room. I couldn't stay still, so I walked downstairs. I tried sitting down on the couch, but I couldn't do it. I paced around the downstairs while my mom left a message for my psychiatrist. Eventually, I ended up sitting down on the couch with my mom rubbing my back while the medicine started to kick in. Thankfully, I was able to get to sleep that night, but at a really late time. In result, I got to go to school late the next day. Yippee, a positive side!
Always try to find a positive side to everything. It helps a lot.
Last week was a bit of a rough week for my tics, but this week has gone averagely. Yes, that is a word. I didn't know until I typed it and there was no red, squiggly line under it.
Yesterday, I had to get a facial done at the Skin Institute. It's a spa-like dermatology center. I had to leave my former dermatology office because I didn't understand the doctor's accent... oh yeah, and the medicine they prescribed never helped, but I like to think that it was mostly because of the accent. Anyway, I had been anxious since during a facial you have to hold a bit still. I mean, they put needles in your face to extract nasty stuff! It's not like you can just move all over the place while they poke you with needles! Or so I thought. It actually went pretty smoothly. I was able to relax during the steam mask even though it basically suffocates you, and then when the lady was poking needles into me, I still furrowed my eyebrows together, and I was able to! She didn't object to it at all. Probably since people knit their eyebrows together because of the slight pain. Thank God the procedure went smoothly; I wasn't very worried about it, but that was because I had forgotten about it until yesterday.
Next week I go to Atlanta, Georgia with the rest of my chorus! It's going to be tons of fun; I just really hope my Tourettes doesn't act up. I don't want a night like I had last Monday, especially since my mom will not be with me in Georgia. I'm going to take my every night medicines, PLUS my Clonazepam and Valium! I tend to over pack a bit, but I never know if I might need both. Hey, it's better to accidentally bring too much than too little.

Thanks for reading!

Emma<3

Youth Ambassador

Hello Everyone!

I just finished calling and e-mailing my senators' and representative's offices about making appointments during my trip to DC in April with the TSA. Super exciting! ...And stressful. There is so much to do! I have to e-mail persistently, work on what exactly I'm going to say at the meeting, and try to get an excused educational absence from school for the days I will be gone! Okay, that doesn't sound like a lot... but I have Anxiety Disorder, so it is a lot to me.

My squeaking tic is really annoying me. I'm pretty sure it would annoy most anybody. I'm really glad that it has not disrupted class at all. I think I'm focused during class, which leads to less tics. Even taking this into account, my tics can still get bad during class. I'm surprised my squeaking tic has not been extremely persistent during class. Surprised... and grateful! Another tic that has been trying to get on my bad side is my leg muscle tensing tic. It works up a lot. Sometimes, I walk funny because of it. When I tense my legs, they lock up, so when I'm walking and ticcing, it looks strange... kind of like I'm not bending my legs while I walk. It looks pretty dorky, but I honestly don't care. I don't care what anyone thinks of me. Just what I think of myself.

I have a new prescription! My tics have been on the rise, so I am now going to take Valium when my tics get really bad. It's a muscle relaxer, so hopefully I will get some good sleep and tic less while on it. Let's hope for the best!

This is the last call for any questions about Tourette Syndrome that people want answered! You can email them to me at lifesatwitch.emma@gmail.com or comment on this post! I plan on shooting the video soon, and I already have some good questions that are going to be in the video.

Hey, I think TSA Youth Ambassador is going to look pretty good on my college applications!(;

Thanks for reading!!!

Emma<3

TSA Youth Ambassador Conference!

Hey Everyone,

I'm working on my paperwork for the Tourette Syndrome Youth Ambassador Conference!
I had to fill something out about Youth Ambassador Leadership Training.
I was just wondering if anyone else was going.
If you are, please tell me!

I'm extremely excited, and I will definitely blog about it once I am home. The conference is in April, so of course, I understand that is a little ways away from now, but I'm still super elated to be going!

On another note... Please check out the new documentary "Out of Our Control: The Chronicled Lives of Tourette's Syndrome"
I am in it, as well as many other teens and young adults who suffer from TS. Please check it out! It is on YouTube. The wonderful Ruthie Pershing made it, and her YouTube username is dispensingstarlight. So, please check that out! Also, check out her blog! It's called "A Little Bit Different: A Life with Tourette's Syndrome"

Thank you all!

Emma<3